It’s Monday Night before Christmas
And football is playing
The Packers and Bears
in the snow. I’m just saying.

The drunks who are shirtless
Are feeling no pain,
Yelling, “Hi, Mom” and “Da Bears.”
Oh where is the shame?

At halftime the game
Remains scoreless, it’s true.
The announcers are bored,
And their lips are blue through.

Icy spots on the field
Make an interesting game.
Otherwise, caliber: not
Hall of Fame.

The defense is awful,
The offense horrific,
But no one here cares
‘Cuz this eggnog’s terrific.

The only thing lower than the score
Is the temperature.
Come tomorrow the hangovers
Will be worse than this weather.

But some of us will happily
Skip the frostbite.
To hell with the game.
I bid you good night.